I’m variously amused and horrified by the search terms that land people on the shores of The Reedster Speaks. For example, just today someone found me while searching for “thong moms”. Which is understandable, given my recent “Real Moms Don’t Wear Thongs Post.” But still creepy.
So in a phoning-it-in-esque post, I decided to post some other things your friends and neighbors are searching for. Things that Google believes are somehow connected to my delicate little blog. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
* Katniss Everdeen childfree
* my husband is always late and never calls.
* “aproned” [quotation marks theirs]
* 1950s breastfeeding photos
* pubes old granny
* juicing – a recipe that doesn’t taste like crap [I’m sorry, searcher. THERE ARE NONE.]
* Why bipolar boyfriend says we are too different when he is manic [Answer: When we are manic, we bipolars speak the truth.]
* Bipolar and mosquitoes
* kohls socks
* princess zombie from zombie land
* gay shit funny
* body parts milk and cookies
* what are inappropriate blogging [Isn’t that the eternal question? What ARE inappropriate blogging?]
* creating a fake salad shop for kids [Sorry. You’ll find no crafts here. Move along.]
* i tell a joke laugh then realized it wasn’t funny [This never happens to The Reedster. Every syllable out of my mouth is pure comedic genius.]
* wooden well covers [TWO people found my blog this way. I don't even know what these are. Sounds very "Little House on the Prairie."]
* crap gift basket [THREE people found my blog using this term. This?? This is a craft I could make].
Enjoy your long weekend, American readers!
Bloggers – give it up in the comments. What search terms have people used to find your blog?